Like most people in modern U.S. society, I was raised under the old adage “quitters never win, and winners never quit.” Sound familiar? For most of my life, “quitter” just meant someone who couldn’t step up to the plate. It wasn’t until I got to graduate school that I realized all the sacrifices I made to get there would be overshadowed by all the sacrifices I would need to make to stay there. I thought “Wait a damn minute.” Not only was I socialized to believe that I could never quit hard things, but thanks to grind culture the hard things would also never end. 
I could run the marathon of life like a sprint and the only thing grind culture would say at the end of it is “Couldn’t you have just run a little faster?”
I don’t think so.
So, in the spirit of my newfound consciousness, here is a list of all the things I’m quitting.
- Big groups of people
- Being spoken over
- Snapchat group chats
- Time spent outside of myself
- Being coerced into work projects that I don’t want to do
- Foods I don’t like
- Daily schedules that are planned to the minute
- Reading things that don’t serve me
- Guilt because of other people’s behavior
- Planning hour-long meetings that could have been ten minutes
- Waking up before the sun
- Trying not to be awkward
- Shame for seeing the best in others, then being wrong
On the other hand, there are a few things that I am in desperate need of.
- Cozy smells
- Slow mornings
- One-on-one time with friends
- Breathing
- Writing
- Letting my mind wander
- Comfortable clothes
Your turn. What things, people, or ideas do you need to let go of? As trained soldiers in the army of grind culture, quitting is easier said than done. But you don’t need to quit right now, you can just think about what you would quit right now. Believe in the power of naming the things that hold you back. As you ponder quitting, ask yourself these questions:
- What do I spend most of my time thinking about? Am I satisfied with the amount of space this takes up in my mind?
- What are things I dread often? Is it speaking with a particular person, doing a daily routine, or anxiety about the future? How can I adjust my approach to make it more bearable?
- Who am I jealous of and why?
- Do I worry about things outside of my control?
- When do I feel most safe, comfortable, and happy?
- What impedes me from quitting what doesn’t serve me? Is it financial, health, or others’ expectations?
- Do I feel pressure to look, act, or think a certain way? Where does that pressure come from?
Many times, we think that quitting anything will steer us away from our goals, but letting weeds grow in your garden will stifle the growth of the flowers you planted. In truth, just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you should. And as much as we like pretend, we can’t do it all. That’s what it means to be human. So, take the leap and quit some things, you may just find your garden thrives when you do.
